Off late my 13-year old daughter
keeps telling me that she can’t wait to be 18 years old and then she would move
out of the `jail’ (yeah, I who imagined myself as an indulgent mom is jail
superintendent).
I smile and ask her to elaborate on
the fantasy of staying away from parents. What exactly will she do? “I will get
up whenever I want to and do whatever I felt like,” says the daughter. “What
exactly is this `whatever’,” I insist. “Hmmm…like buying clothes which I feel
like; I will not eat any fruit for days…I will watch whichever movies I want to
and play for as long as I want to,” says the girl, who is clearly in a good
mood.
She believes being an adult is
freedom to do whatever you want to. She is really off the mark, as most of us
know. I so want to tell her that being an adult is such drudgery. To think
about future; money; meals; bank stuff; taxes; work-life balance; mean horrible
bosses; retirement; insurance etc. is no fun.
I want to tell her to enjoy being
young and without any major responsibility for as long as she can. Why would
anyone want to grow up when the only headache in life is to complete your
homework? When you don’t have to worry about putting food on table or your bank
balance? Why rush though life when there is so much to enjoy in the present?
Enjoy my dear, for it will be over soon…
I don’t say any of this because I
know she will not understand.
“Hmmm…since you are clear about what
you want in life, maybe it is a good idea to develop some life skills. I think
you can start by learning how to clean the room and then maybe how to cook. Of
course you can learn to cook whatever you feel like. The clothes that you buy
[once you are 18 yrs] would need to be kept properly and I won’t be around to
do that, right??”
“Grrrrr…..,” the daughter growls and
walks out of the room.
Sigh!!
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